The Dilbert Principle

I must confess, I read Scott Adams' Dilbert Principle a little too early. At that time, I could not appreciate the humor as much as I do now :)But now that I have a job (don't know for how long) I am beginning to see what Scott envisioned.

'Work' equates to conference calls and more conference calls discussing what went wrong with what was planned during the previous conference call. The rest of the time, you are free to do whatever you want to as long as you show that you add value to the company. Often, this involves remaining silent on most conference calls and saying something vague (read corporate mambo-jambo) when asked for an opinion. An exception to this rule is the last minute work that gets shoved onto your desk by your boss. These require some scurrying around and usually result in frantic emails/calls. An eternal optimist will capitalize on these rare occasions to wash away any guilt that he/she is being compensated for just being physically present at work. The rest of time can be spent on facebook, chat windows or other tools that have a proven track record of keeping boredom at bay.

At the end of the day, as long as you remain in control of your emotions and think, speak and act logically, you can lay claim to have all that it takes to succeed in pretty much any job. Good communication skills, PowerPoint and Excel skills, and the ability to manage relationships well help you take the elevator on your way up instead of the escalator. Specific to the US, additional skills required to be on the fast track to success include the ability to drink for a long time without getting inebriated and being up to date with what is happening on the sports scene.

My Dad once told me that in order to succeed at the workplace, you must realize that people that work above you are fools and you must either be one or learn to act like one. I am still trying to figure out whether I am acting or just being myself!

If you spent the last few minutes reading this drivel, I apologize - my entire post can be summarized by Dilbert.



Disclaimer: This was not posted while I was at work. The post was not inspired by, or have any relation to my job. I work hard and put in long hours.